The Future

I am scared for my future. I do not know how to express that sentence properly, but there it is.

I am currently studying teaching and still have a long way to go before I am finished. It is very expensive. I gather money by house sitting for people who goes away on vacation or just for the weekend. With covid my income has almost halved.

It worries me that the fees goes up every year. How will I gather enough with my expenses included? Besides the money problems I worry if I will be able to get a job. Will I be good enough for teaching? Will I be able to do it properly? I struggle with dealing and talking to strangers and large groups of people. Just thinking about it makes me want to run away. I am sure I will be able to do it, but really, it scares the shit out of me.

I worry about doing my practicals. I am scared teachers will judge me and say I am not fit and would not be able to be a good teacher. I am sure it is just my insecurities that’s talking.

Lastly I am going to be oooolllldddd when I am finished. Probably in my thirties. I am worried that people will hire first the young and then the old.

I am going to apply for a bursary and hope for the best. I really hope that God will look out for me. And clear my path for me.

Sorry for my poor grammar. Ps. One if my subjects will be grammar so maybe it will improve!😂😂